“You are not paid to think,” remarked my line manager; the CEO of a £80 million business.
I was flabbergasted. As the company’s Head of Marketing, he was paying me a generous annual sum (plus benefits) to “not think". If I wasn’t allowed to express opinion, provide council or develop strategic marketing recommendations, what was he paying me for? I was baffled.
On a separate occasion the same CEO handed me a copy of the marketing coursework he'd submitted on his MBA 5 years earlier, recommending I familiarise myself with the "current" marketing strategy, and requested I revert with a 12 month activation proposal.
In a different business a newly appointed Marketing Director, at our second 1-2-1, told me I was "underperforming". He couldn’t give me any examples of where or how! His predecessor had ranked me “outstanding” in my annual performance review (just months earlier). Feedback from my team/peers described me as “supportive, inspirational, focussed, collaborative, a concise communicator, customer orientated; the leader/colleague we needed”.
My "new" Marketing Director made big statements; discriminating statements. Statements, that confused me due to their lack of supporting evidence. I suggested we'd got off on a poor footing and should use our next 1-2-1 to re-base our relationship. Our next 1-2-1 involved HR and I was made "redundant”. With less than 2 years of service, it was an agile process. To this day I have no idea how I went from hero with his predecessor to zero with him.
As they say, “employees leave bosses not companies”. I completely agree. I resigned from my Head of Marketing role where I wasn’t paid to think. From my perspective the CEO lacked confidence and opted to use his status to yield control and power, shielding his own insecurities. He shied away from challenge whereas great leaders (I believe) embrace challenge and encourage diversity of thinking, they relish alternative perspectives as it enables them to have a rounded view and therefore plan for multiple scenarios.
I am glad I was dismissed by the “new” Marketing Director. Respect works two-ways, and has to be earnt. He did not respect me enough to provide evidence to back his statement pertaining to my under performance, and consequently he lost credibility with me.
Management and leadership and very different. In both these examples I had managers, neither were leaders. Yes, both held status, authority and even power within the their business but neither were leaders. In hindsight I feel sad for them. I believe both had their own demons, and insecurities which caused them to act as they did. (I had applied for the Marketing Director role when my boss took an internal promotion. I didn't get the role. Maybe this made the incoming MD uncomfortable. I don't know why; he was ultimately offered the role).
The CEO was fired 24 months after I left, after nearly 20 years of service. The business owner citing a lack of faith in his ability to move the company forward after several years of static performance.
The Marketing Director completed a short tenure before taking a sideways role in a different geography, despite previously being earmarked in the UK's succession plan.
Both managers (in my bias analysis) lacked openness and an acceptance of vulnerability, the ability to listen and the desire to collaborate. Both wanted to stamp authority and belittle others.
Simon Sinek speaks about leadership with authority. He titled one of his books “Leaders Eat Last”, in which he draws on case studies and stories of leaders who have “led by example” gaining respect and support from their team/colleagues/counterparts.
Whilst at university I worked in a nightclub. One night the deputy manager of the club covered his hand and arm in a black bin bag, before submerging his limb into the depths of one of the gents’ toilets. A patron who had clearly had too much to drink, lost control of his bodily function and s*!t himself, had in a moment of inebriation (or extreme embarrassment), removed his boxer shorts and shoved them into the u-bend; blocking the loo. Other patrons had ignored the obvious signs of a blockage, instead continuing to defecate, adding to the blockage. The only way to rectify the situation was to remove the undergarment. It was a horrific, gag-inducing task. It was a task the deputy manager personally faced into, he had opted not to delegate.
Nearly 25 years later I still remember his name; Chris. Chris braved the situation, he then gathered the team and said, “I won’t ask you to do anything I am not prepared to do myself; I respect you and I ask that you respect me”. After that we all respected Chris. I don’t recall any task, as disgusting or gut-wrenching as the one Chris executed, but I do remember people volunteering when Chris asked.
What I have learnt;
- Rank doesn’t grant you respect, you have to earn respect
- Leaders can’t be egotistical, they need to be receptive, to listen and canvas broad option, they can't have tunnel vision
- Feedback needs to be evidenced, think before you speak (be mindful of what you want to convey and how best to convey it so your message is heard but your words aren’t harmful)
- Respect your team, and in return they are more likely to respect and be loyal to you
- Lead by example